So, thank you life for taking me to the crashing waves of transition, tossing me around beneath your waves and continuing to attempt to pull me back under. However, I am on to you and will be kicking and paddling me darndest only to one day stand atop you and ride that wave to victory.
Ok. I'm weird. It's ok, I've come to terms with how unusual my brain processes information. I kinda like it, but others have no clue where I come from at times. ANYWAYS…
I am just now starting to get a footing on life. I nearly hold my breath to write those words for fear that I will soon again be tossed around by life (which I am sure will happen over the next few years), however, it's the truth.
I went into work today and re-arranged my classroom to my liking. I have been running off of a skeleton classroom, arranged like the previous year, with hardly any manipulatives (educational toys) or centers (places to put those toys). BUT, today was the day that I made it my own. There is still a lot of work to be done, but it looks so much better. Seriously, I can't stand a badly laid out classroom, with junk everywhere (or nothing at all). The room had all the shelves lining the walls of the classroom, with books thrown here and there, basket full of who knows what, and minimal decorations which just aren't up to par for this New Jersey blooded girl. So, I shifted everything (including my co-teachers desk and shelves…whoops) and used the shelves to create different areas of the classroom (more defined rather than a large open classroom that the kids interpret as a large running field). I also hung some of the kids art work (which is pretty amazing for the age…but then again I am biased). And finally, I changed the desk arrangement. Let's hope the kids can handle all the changes. I did give my co-teacher a heads up so she could go ahead and prepare herself, in case she needed that sort of thing. I would.
Friendships. I have had time this week to spend time with different people from school. It has been nice developing friendships with some people that have lived here awhile and others that are in the same rocky transition boat. I know that I will continue to develop deep friendships and am grateful that the Lord heard my cry for fellowship. I have also been attending a fellowship on Sundays which was hard for me at the beginning. Nearly all of the other single ladies go to the fellowship a little ways away, but I felt called to attend the one at school for the time being. I was so worried that I would be left out because I went to a different fellowship or that people would think I didn't want to be friends with them, but then I had to realize that I would rather be obedient and risk not having those relationships, then to disobey. It was hard last week because I really didn't agree with the way one of the leaders handle something (trying not to air dirty laundry here) and I mentioned it to a couple of people. I really didn't even want to come back to the church because of it. I felt like it was completely unbiblical and rather insulting. But, I know I am called to be there for now and so I returned (it helped that a couple of people that have attended the fellowship mentioned that they had never seen anything like that since they've been there). Today, the leader quietly confronted the issue and I was grateful to have seen that. Just think, if I had decided not to go because of this one person's actions, I would have misjudged the fellowship as holding the same views. I am glad to see that this action was not the norm and that God is faithful in all things. After all, I'm just trying to go to worship Him, grow in my faith, and worship Him.
On another note, I have been using a little of my Chinese. Class went well and having a few friends that speak the language well has been helpful. I am eager to learn the language fluently, but need to remember that Mandarin is a hard language. I will work hard and continue to strive for fluency (or even just to have short conversations with those I pass every day). I am praying for a mind that understands quickly, a Spirit of bravery to use what I've learned and not become embarrassed about not getting it completely correct, and a heart to push on when the going gets tough (and it will). I checked out a children's book the other day and have been working through it with translation and that has been a fun process. I feel like I'm noticing words more in the story (and characters sometimes) which is an awesome feeling!
Ok, I'm off to bed. I'm learning that a good night's sleep (even if just 4 hours for tonight) helps a lot with the emotional response to life. Not always, but sometimes. :)
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